Applied Reason Immune Deficiency

Religion is ARID.
(Applied Reason Immune Deficiency)

(John Lennon's Imagine, (instrumental), plays softly in the
background.)

"Hello. I'm a good looking celebrity you almost remember, asking for your help fighting a terrible disease.
This disease has been plaguing mankind for what seems forever and it affects people worldwide.
It's called ARID and with your support, we can end this terrible disease.
Often beginning in desert climes, ARID is usually passed from parents to children. Some highly contagious places are churches, mosques, and synagogues, though no place is truly safe from this disease, which attacks the reason and doubt portions of the brain.
It is often contracted through blood, though it can also be contracted verbally or in written form.
Just some of the symptoms of ARID include cognitive dissonance, an inability to question this disease, and a nasty superiority complex.
If you know some insufferable people, you may know some ARID sufferers."
(Spokesperson tears up a little.)
"Please help while there's still time. We've made some real progress with medicines from Four Horsemen Pharmaceuticals with drugs like Hitchslap, Dawkicillen, Harrisoid, and Dennicene, but there is so much more we can do.
New medicines are needed to reach the billions affected by ARID.
Talk about ARID at work and among friends. Get the word out. ARID does not grow well near the light of truth and reason, which are natural ARIDicides, so the more you talk about it, the better our chances at finding a cure.
With your help, we can beat this dangerous, highly contagious, and inevitably annoying disease.
Thank you for your time."

(Uncomfortably loud and poorly sung cover ...) "Imagine all the people, living life in peace..."